There are dreams that are just that, Dreams. Then there are those dreams that with hard work and perseverance can actually become a reality. Well, now that I have decided to go for it and follow my dream on top of of everything else I realize that time is now another obstacle that I must also overcome in order to achieve my goal. Of course one can't "overcome" time but what it seems to be doing to me is placing barriers to the fabulous future that I envision for myself; you're too old to start over, you don't have enough time to finish what you start, if you only started earlier you could have planned this out better..... all those depressingly familiar negative voices in your head that sound so practical and are helpfully keeping you from making this horrible mistake., really! So how does one counter all those little voices and go after it anyway? For me it's been a battle, each day I wake up not knowing how I will feel about my future. Some days I feel so excited about the possibilities then others when it seems like it is just a hopeless dream. But the one thing that keeps me going is my teenage daughter. She is right at that time in her life where she too is discovering her passion and her dream. She comes to me for pep talks when she needs bolstering. When she is scared of the future or has doubts about her abilities I remind her of her strength, how she can do anything if she puts her mind to it and has faith in herself. I tell her too (with all my older generation wisdom) that life is short so just go for it as there is no point in settling for something she's not into one hundred percent! Life should be fun, an adventure! In fact last night after encouraging her in an upcoming life hurdle I told her to just "get out of your own way and and do what you do best. YOU!" So maybe I need to heed my own advice and and just go for it myself and stop worrying about what might or might not happen. She may have the luxury of time to fulfill her dreams but there is something to be said about the lack of time for me. If I want to do this and create a new life as a designer I can use my past experiences and wisdom to cut through all the crap and unnecessary steps, a fast track to my goal. After all, at my age I don't feel the need to be so appropriate and this lack of time can light that fire that I need to achieve the life of my dreams.
putting it all out there.
5 foot 5' 3/4" (although I am now probably 5'5")